Mistic Pets

Welcome to Issue 74
Created by The Mistic Pets Team

Local Bum
Written By Bums for Bud

Bud the Bum has recently announced his plans to run for Supreme Emperor of Mistica. With the campaign slogan “Give me your tax money and get off my lawn!” and colorful posters depicting piles of garbage giving the thumbs up, he hopes to win the election this fall for the title.

Other candidates for the title of Supreme Emperor of Mistica include a lawn gnome named Skippy and a ficus plant that was stolen out of an office building and is wearing oversized novelty glasses and an inflatable guitar. When asked about the competition, Bud was quoted as saying, “Why would anyone vote for them? The one guy is more concerned about decorating the nation's lawns than the real issues, and the other guy is positively wooden!”

Many critics and naysayers against Bud's campaign have tried to point out that “Supreme Emperor of Mistica” is not a position that actually exists. Comments Bud the Bum, “If elected as Supreme Emperor of Mistica, my first act in office shall be to declare “Supreme Emperor of Mistica” an actual position that exists! My second act will be to eliminate garbage day for a few weeks because you guys are starting to bury my TV under all your refuse and this stuff isn't selling well these days.”

Voting for the position begins in November. Anyone who votes for Bud is promised to receive a free bent spork for their support.

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