Mistic Pets

Welcome to Issue 4
Created by The Mistic Pets Team

Who's That Degenerate!: The Obsideon Factor
Written By Zen

Welcome, ladies and germs, to another sparkling fresh edition of "Who's That Degenerate!". I'm your host, Reed Fluffenbottom. Here with us today, standing a stately six-foot-two, seven if you include the hair, is the one and only Radovan Hervatskee, DJ DSP.

Radovan: Please be calling me Ovan. Your accent sounds like garbage disposal.

Reed: Ah, what an exotic accent you have there Radovan, now tell us, where do you hail from? It sounds vaguely Russian.

Ovan: I "hail" from great nation of Mother Croatia. Not Russian piece of-

Reed: Oookay there, you gotta watch out for the kids, eheheh..

Ovan: ...

Reed: Sooooo, Ovan! I hear you spin a mean vinyl. Care to tell us about it?

Ovan: If only to get you to stop butchering my name with your.. Ugh. Whatever. Anyway. Yes, I am DJ of ritzy nightclub Core Addiction. Is run by my close, personal friend Danzig.

Reed: Danzig, huh? Is that his first name?

Ovan: .. Not going to let rougish accent trample all over his first name. Danzig is fine.

Reed: .... So! Speaking of names, how do you pronounce yours, Mr. Hervatskee?

Ovan: ...

(Ovan stares intently, as if trying to hold back a torrent of fire and brimstone.)

Ovan: Roll r, with your tongue. Hrrrrrvatski. Is meaning Croatian in mother language. Family is deeply rooted in Mother country.

Reed: So, tell the viewers Ovan. Why do you dress so .. oddly?

Ovan: Because is style and I like it, there is no other reason. Is not odd.

Reed: Tell us about Core Addiction. What keeps the patrons coming back?

Ovan: Music is always upbeat and hip with times, and of course they come back for me. Radovan Hrvatski is DJ extraordinaire. Drinks are also good.

Reed: Who else do you work with?

Ovan: Danzig of course, is owner of fine establishment.. Also floozy drink girl, forget her name. Something sounding like por-

Reed: Whoa-hoa-hoa there buddy, we can't air that kind of language!

Ovan: ... Porcelain.

Reed: So anyway, moving on. Why do you wear an ankh around your neck? What's the symbology behind that?

Ovan: Ankh is key of life. One of my creeds is live life to the fullest and explore everything is having to offer.

Reed: Is that why your hair's purple and yellow?

Ovan: No, I just like colors. Remind me of thunderstorm.

Reed: So what do you do in your spare time?

Ovan: Mix CDs for music, search internet for music, shop at stores for music..

Reed: Do you mix your own songs?

Ovan: Sometimes yes I do make my own music but other times I just buy license and use what is out there.

Reed: How do you afford all of the licenses you buy?

Ovan: Family is rich, like Ferdinand in old days in Habsburg.

Reed: That makes a lot of sense. Well Ovan, it looks like we're out of time, is there anything you'd like to say to the audience before you go?

Ovan: .. Don't do drugs? I don't know what to say, I don't know these people.

Well, we've run out of time, but make sure to check in next month on..

WHO'S THAT DEGENERATE!

Until next time, I'm your host, Reed Fluffenbottom.

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