Mistica Chronicles
Welcome to Issue 41
Created by The Mistic Pets Team
How to be Safe on Mistmas
Written By Fallout
Ah, Mistmas! A jolly time of jolliness where family and friends exchange gifts, decorate their homes with tacky decorations, and destroy the homes of countless Vix and Skillow so that they may have a tree to hang more tacky decorations on and to stuff their gifts under! But beneath all this joy and merriness is a more sinister aspect of the holidays. Trees can catch fire! Cookies can burn in your oven! Little Jimmy can shoot his eye out with his new BB gun! How can you prevent these terrible accidents, you may ask? By reading and memorizing these handy Mistmas safety tips of course!
1. Practice fire safety! Nearly everything around you can catch on fire. Your tree, your bad cooking, those candy cane pajamas you bought for Wee Cindy and Billy Jr., even that stash of dynamite and gasoline that your crazy uncle keeps in the basement for some reason. How do you prevent fires when you're practically living in a fiery deathtrap waiting to happen? Simple. Just ban your family from using fire for the entire month! In fact, why risk even a little spark igniting something? Ban electricity altogether! Live like cave people until January! Let the moon be your flashlight! Also, if you have any Inferno pets, lock them out of the house and make them sleep on the lawn until the danger has passed. In fact, you might want to lock everyone out and make them sleep at their friends' houses. It's the only way to be sure!
2. Check safety warnings and dangerous toy lists before buying Mistmas gifts! There's nothing worse than having your Phelocan fall and break a feather because no one warned you of the tripping hazard on Pull Along Cherai. Don't get them anything that can accidentally or intentionally be turned into a projectile. This means dart guns, paddle balls, bouncy balls...actually pretty much everything can be thrown and turned into a projectile, so don't get anything hard. But then again, soft toys and plushies can still potentially trip someone down the stairs. Get them all socks. Socks are the safest present yet! Unless you have linoleum floors.
3. Watch out for hazardous decorations! Ceramic MeriKlaus statues can trip people, so don't put them in the middle of your walkway or on parts of the lawn where they might get buried in snow and trip up playful pets. Don't let your Lirionox chew on the cords to the Mistmas tree lights unless you wanted to box him Storm but didn't have the credits to do so. Ornaments can break and become sharp. If you want to be on the safe side, don't decorate the tree at all. In fact, why have the tree in the first place? Anyai like to climb and your pets can accidentally tear the whole tree down. Your best bet is to either nail the tree to the wall or just decorate the neighbor's holly bush. They'll be visiting relatives all month anyway, so they'll be none the wiser.
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